The other day I saw a meme on Facebook that said, “ do something today that your future self will thank you for.” I am all for this from a health standpoint, but it was being used on this occasion as a marketing technique to encourage someone to invest in a business seminar.It got me thinking about how in the hell I got here.Back in 2016, with no understanding of what I wanted to do with my time or my life, I was obsessed with figuring out my calling. I pored through articles about how to find your passion, took countless interest inventories, asked everyone I knew what their dream job was…and still could never, ever, in a million and a half years have told you I was going to find my calling in coaching. EVER.Sometimes we box ourselves in by thinking we have to stick to a plan just because we chose to try it.
Read moreHow I Made My House My Haven: Part Three
When we moved into our new home almost 3 years ago, I made some intentional choices in the way we set up each room and the flow of the house so that it would feel peaceful, cozy and quiet. These choices have helped the house truly feel like our little zen space.
Read moreHow I Made My House My Haven: Part Two
One of the best things I did when I started focusing on self-care was develop a nightly ritual. Managing my anxiety is easier when I am prepared, and following a nightly ritual prepares me mentally and physically for sleep and for the next day.Clean UpEvery night, I load/unload my dishwasher and rinse out the sink. I know this seems a little extreme, but there is something about having a clean sink that makes your entire kitchen seem cleaner.
Read moreHow I Made My House My Haven: Part One
About 2 years ago, my husband and I moved into a fully updated bungalow that we both just love. We both feel like we've been there for years and years, because we are comfortable in it and it meets our needs so well.Living in our old home (what I lovingly refer to as our "honeymoon house"), we were kind of slobs, y'all. We always had to do a lot of deep cleaning whenever we hosted events, and things stayed cluttered a lot of the time. It made me INSANE. My anxiety was always kind of spiking because I felt like, even when I just wanted to relax and unwind, there was always something screaming to be cleaned, de-cluttered, organized, or tidied.When we moved into our new house, my husband and I made choices to change those habits in our new home, and not fall into old patterns.
Read moreWhat It Actually Means To Have Your BEST YEAR EVER!!!!
We’ve all seen them! The ads and posts that start somewhere right around Thanksgiving:“19 Ways to Take Control of your Finances In the New Year!”“5 New Years Resolutions Everyone Should Commit To.”“6 Foods You Shouldn’t Be Eating If You Want to Feel Better in Next Year.”“How (App Name) Has Millennials Crushing their Goals!” “This (insert product name) Will Have you Saying YASSSSS in (year)!”The ad copy or post almost always ends with some form of “and make (year) your BEST EVER!!!!! Nowadays, if I think whatever is being directed at me may have some value, I will read it or look into it, but a few years ago, right after I had completed my first full year of self-care (with a veritable SHIT TON of trial and error), I was SO SICK of those ads and posts and articles.
Read moreChristmas is My Happy Place
YOU GUYS! It's finally Christmastime. Christmas has always, always been my soul soother, my mood lightener, my happy place.For a long time, I didn't know why Christmastime made me so happy, but when I started to really work on my self-care, I realized two things:
Read moreBattling Toxicity with Loving Detachment
We all have been in a situation or environment that felt toxic, right? Sometimes, due to what we are going through or someone we love is going through, that relationship can even feel toxic. On occasion, we must endure someone who is truly just a toxic person. There are times when all of these toxic elements can crash in on each other - and one of them is the holiday season.Let's be honest - we aren't all going to get along all the time. You love these people, but sometimes they make you cray.
Read moreEnjoy The Now: A Guided Meditation
Deep Breath....in....out…Release the day…Release the "shoulds"…Feel gratitude for this time to ground yourself…Deep Breath....in....out…Place your hand over your heart…Feel all the love that resides there…Hold all those you love in the light…Hold yourself in the light…Deep Breath....in....out…Keep holding yourself in the light…Congratulate yourself on all you are…Encourage yourself in all you want to be…Love yourself unconditionally…Deep Breath....in....out…
Read moreChange is the Worst
Guys, I have told myself for years and years that I hate change. For several of those years, I really did. Change threw me into an anxiety spiral, I had surges of crushing panic and lashed out at the people around me.Change is so bizarre, isn't it? For me, I feel like the lack of control when it comes to change is what triggers all those negative reactions.Since perfectionism has always been a challenge for me, being in control (so that I could make things perfect!) was a major theme in my life. Not knowing what's going to happen, not knowing what to expect - TERRIFYING, because I wasn't in control.Several weeks ago, my therapist challenged me to try and not play everything out to the nth degree. Just BE in this journey. When I heard that, honestly, I thought, "Pfffft. Okay. That'll happen."
Read moreThe Three Main Questions to Ask When Crafting a Self-Care Vision Statement
Hey there! If you've purchased my guidebook, you know that a major part of my process is crafting a vision statement. I know, I know! Everyone and their dog has had you put together a vision statement, and it's just kind of silly, right? I get it! I really do. When I first started working on different versions of life inventories and vision statements, I thought it was sort of ridiculous. That being said, I really have found immense value in having a short go-to statement I can keep in view when I am planning, reflecting, or setting goals.So, the basics on a vision statement are pretty much the same no matter whose formula you are using: Use the present tense, Use "I" and keep it pretty succinct.With self-care, I want to challenge you to add another layer by answering these three questions:
Read moreAuthenticity + Vulnerability = Clarity
Self-compassion is such a gift. We all have that small voice that seems to express our most honest needs and desire. A lot of the time, we tune out that inner voice, and when we do acknowledge it we excuse it or ignore it or reason ourselves out of acting on it.When you begin to allow yourself to be more vulnerable, and you work to practice authenticity, you will also find yourself honoring that small voice a lot more often.You will find that small voice is really your guiding light, your true self, and by honoring it you will be living a more fulfilled and happier existence.Self-compassion will become a direct result of higher levels of authenticity and vulnerability, whether or not that's your intention.Here are some ways that I have found to honor my authentic self and make myself vulnerable:
Read moreSelf-Care Basics
Hey y'all! What are the basics of self-care, and how do we use them to build intentional self-care routines?The Three Pillars:There are three major components to self-care.
Positive Self-Talk
Self-Compassion
Intentional Habit Building
Permission To Be Yourself
Hello Friends!I am so glad you are here! I want to talk for a minute about self-care. What it is, what it looks like, and how it can help you. You ever hear that adage, "You can't pour from an empty cup?" Is your next immediate thought, "Well, then what have I been doing all these years?" Yep, me too.So how do we take our crazy, overstimulating, chaotic, overly busy lives and find some time to "fill our cup?" The short answer is that most of the time, we don't. We can't count on a consistent and prolonged period of time for us to do all the big and small things that make us feel whole and happy. What we CAN do, is make small, habitual changes over time.When we start with a vision and set intentional habits and goals, self-care builds and builds and eventually we are feeling good, living right and enjoying what we are doing and who we are doing it with.And that all sounds AHMAZING, right? And totally impossible, right? I know. I know!
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